Active AimA Journey and Destination

Newborn babies have no self esteem problems. They have no concept of failure or falling short of

expectations. In a very real sense, our interactions with other people are the root causes of low self esteem.

Since you cannot avoid interacting with people, you have to learn how to identify these causes and stop them

from affecting you.

Low Self Esteem From The People You Know

Parents lay the foundation for self image. Children understand that parents expect certain things of them,

and if they fail these expectations, it can decrease their sense of self worth. It is important for parents to

realize the limits to which they can push their offspring to excellence. You cannot change your past, and you

cannot blame your parents for wanting you to succeed, but what you can change is the way you look at it.

Acknowledge the love, learn to set aside the disappointment, and move on.

Your partner also has certain expectations regarding your relationship, so it is important that these

expectations are verbalized. Constant dialogue is important as there can be no greater blow to self image that

being though of as falling short of an ideal that you do not even know about. The same principle can be

applied to relationships with friends and relatives. Be sure that you can clarify your role and understand

what they expect of you.

Work relationships are at once both easier and harder on self image. On one hand, your job description

makes the expectations of the people in the workplace crystal clear. On the other hand, this clarity also

makes in easier to point out your shortcomings. What is important in this situation is to realize that a job is

an opportunity for growth. If you do no have the required skills yet, identify them so you can acquire them

and meet your goals.

Low Self Esteem From The People You Don’t Know

The opinions of total strangers affect all of us to a certain degree. These perceptions may reach your in many

different ways. You may overhear comments of people as you walk down the street. You may read comments

about you written in blogs or articles. You may identify with certain groups that are discussed in the media,

such as on TV or in magazine articles.

Judgments from people who do not know you can sometimes be more devastating than from those close to

you. You may feel unfairly judged or belittled. Worse, you may even partially agree to these negative

pronouncements. This can push your self image even lower. What is important is to identify the feeling and

examine its cause. If you cannot dispute a negative observation yourself, look for positive affirmation. People

who know you can help you set these things into perspective. Many resources both online and in print can

prove these judgments wrong. You may want to avoid magazines or TV shows that make frequent erroneous

pronouncements.

As you can see, our perception of failing other people’s expectations is the seed from which poor self image

sprouts. These causes of low self esteem are ubiquitous and unavoidable so you must learn to guard against

them if you want to grow. Learning to deal with other people in a positive way is the one sure path to

confidence and a good self image.